Wednesday, May 2, 2007

a life in fear!

As I was talking to my friends the other day, somehow polygamy popped up and they started giving their opinions on it. I was sort of shocked to hear that one of them said she was dreading it. The reason was that her uncle married on his wife another one and the reason was that because he felt like it. I felt sad for her because I don't think anyone will be by her side if her husband actually married on her. I tried giving my advice and said 'Make sure the one you marry is open minded and well educated!' They were sure they would do that, I should rephrase: They were sure they will try to do that.
Isn't it really funny that someone at the age of 15 thinks or rather dreads having such a husband? I thought it shouldn't really happen. What about kids living their lives without worries or maybe at least such worries. We all should be secure enough to know that nothing will happen to us unless we choose it and no matter what occurs then we can always control it.
It isn't fair for these things to happen.
There was this girl who used to go to school with us in the same bus, we saw her everyday but she wasn't that social so only good morning was passed between us. Anyhow this year she didn't show up for school, we didn't think it was strange because perhaps they moved or she changed the school. Anyways not much thought was given to it and the school year was spent like every other one. Let me get to the point though... Well my mom was at their house recently and she said that the girl is to be married. Her marriage is to take place tomorrow. She is only 16/17. That wasn't the big shocker though. I am somehow used to hearing about this but she will be the second wife. I don't know if she wants to get married, or she is forced to because her family's condition isn't that good.
Is this where we have lived to be? Can we move on to a better place? I don't think it is a matter of the ability to do so. We have to move on and leave this to the past. It is not the medieval times that we're living in.

What happened to persuading your dreams/goals? If it is your choice then I will leave it to that, but if it wasn't. Then something has to be done regarding this!
We shouldn't be afraid! But what if there was no other way but to be afraid? What can someone who is in the shoes of my friend do if she was up fronted with such a situation?
I would say... Ask for divorce, if you did your job as a wife then he would have no right in marrying someone besides you.
Just thought of letting that out!

1 comment:

Ashok said...

Its quite sad but it is true. Sometimes the things around us force us to question if we are indeed the true masters of our destiny. Education, employment, independance is what we should be looking at for children and as youth. We should be able to choose our life partners and as a couple, decisions should be made collectively. No one has a superior leverage of rights over the other. Anyways the situation is same in India as well, lets hope we can change it.

Wonderfully written; I was beggining to miss some good reading and here comes the first worthwhile post :) Congratulations on getting the award as well.