Different?!

My beginnings in here are always something like: I do not know what to write, or here I am writing some words but still I have no idea what to write about. This time it shall be different because I am not saying I don't know what to write. This will be special. This will be different. This has a meaning. This will be a plead or a prayer to let words come out of my mouth. I am always sitting and writing anything that I think of. This time it is different. I want it to be, I hope it to be, I ask it to be. I do not know if it will be different.
Please, be different!

I think the earlier paragraph only proved this was different. YES, it was different. How can I ask it to be different and not have it be different? Do not you answer what you plead for? I believe so. Sitting around and waiting for an angel to pop up and tell you 'your wishes, my demands' doesn't happen. I am deeply sorry that it was only I who broke this to you. Angels do help us but they do not help the ones who sit waiting for their wants to be filled. I know, I can hear someone saying 'This is cliche' but hey... Cliche isn't always boring!? Or is it? Ah, I do not care to know. Cliche will remain cliche and nothing will ever change. Like it or not, sometimes there isn't anything better than cliche. Now do not come after me and ask 'How?' Because you and I know that I can not answer such a question.

I hate being in the position of the person answering other people's questions. I feel like I am out of my skin. Do not ask, give me the chance to form my questions and you shall hear all kinds of questions. Just do not ask.
Now, I do not know if I said all I wanted to say. Today has been truly good. It was very fruitful. Waking up at 8 in the morning while you have a weekend is azazing. It helped me do so much. I actually for the first time -voluntarily- searched for some school work. I still have a lot to do, but I did SOMETHING. Well, I just had to say these few words about doing some school work. It has to be written so that I have the proof. I will keep bragging about it for sometime until again I return to not doing any extra school work -voluntarily-
Good night now. Hope this was different.
Till next time we meet, take care.