Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Negative energy going down the drain!


"Truth of the matter, he's got the blues" Rock All Day - Outlandish

What if I, too, have got the blues? I'm feeling it and it's not a pleasant feeling. I keep getting annoyed and upset for no reason. I feel like there are a lot of bottled up feelings inside of me, yet I can't define all of them. Sure, there's anxiety, worry, stress, guilt, etc. All of us have these inside, but for some reason, there's something eating me up, it's probably the stress that school is coming soon and I don't feel prepared one way or another. Amotionally I mean. I know it's going to be a roller coaster ride, being the last year and all, and how stressful that's going to be. Almost everyone has been advising us to study hard, and to focus and the likes. In usual cases, that was totally fine, but it's been getting on my nerves, making me feel how serious it will be, and I already know that. I think I need people to tell me, it's going to be fine, you'll do great, and it's not as hard as they say it is...

A lot of things have been getting on my nerves actually. And that is annoying in itself, I hate getting worked up for nothing. I used to feel good knowing I didn't have a temper. I know I'm really awful with dealing with pressure, although there is some good two weeks left for school, it already got me on my toes, for quite sometime now. I just wish I would feel the stress when school started, and things got hectic, it would be more justified. I guess, it doesn't have to be though.


Perhaps this is on my Let-Go-List (Thanks goes to Nema for making me think the reason I'm not perfectly capable of letting go is the fact that I don't exactly know what to let go of, it's got me thinking! So Thank you, Nema, I appreciate it a lot.) :
Let go of un-neseccary worry and stress.
Let go of the constant guilt circles, getting worked up, feeling guilty about it, get worked up for that and act as if I'm angry about something, go about my business and then when someone asks why am I worked up, get worked up for that again... A vicious circle, I tell ya. It may not be as bad as I make it sound, but it feels bad enough.

I need all the positive energy I can get to be honest. These last days should be about feeling all care free and such. I'll try to make it so, I'll put some dancy music and let the stress slip away... :)

Bee Happy people!

2 comments:

Unknown said...

You know, there are good days and bad days, and I'm sure that if you follow the motto "Let go", you'll be more than fine, habibti! ;)

The problem arises when the bad days are more frequent than the good ones...!

And thank you for your lovely comment on my blog :D <3

Nema said...

This is beautiful :)
I loved your to-let-go list, that's my gril!
You know Noor, I've always learned that we do overrate everything, what if you studied really hard and-la qaddar Allah-didn't get the grades you need? it wouldn't really be the end of the world; who knows maybe those not-so-high grades will get you involved in a good college (not talking about the reputation, forget it now), I'm simply talking about finding what you love..you never really know what interests you until you go through what doesn't.
We reach what we want Noor, and yet we go back to ourselves and say "How come I "really" wanted that someday..?"

Bottom line is: don't fear failure, fear success :)

I wish you all the best with your studies sweetie..you do deserve nothing but the best.
Take care well.